Category: Technology - Calm to the storm

Children and mobile phones is a topic that causes a lot of controversy. Are they bad and dangerous or important for safety?

According to a survey by Offcom, almost a quarter of children between five and seven years old have a mobile phone.

You may, quite rightly, be horrified by that statistic. A five-year-old does not need a mobile phone. Nor does a seven-year-old.

The correct age, however, is a question that many are still asking.

What is the right age?

There is no set age that experts agree on as being right for a child to have a phone.

Many suggest looking at the child’s maturity and ability to handle responsibility.

For example, if your child has not yet learnt to look after their things, then you may not want to give them an expensive phone.

More importantly, can you trust your child to follow instructions and communicate openly with you?

As well as considering the when, think about the why. Would a phone be a means of enabling independence and communication? Independence and communication are great reasons. If it is less about connecting your child with the world and more about keeping them distracted, look for other distractions and leave the mobile phone for another time.

Children and Mobile Phones: The Bad

Many adults rely on their mobile phones. However, there is a lot of press about the danger of giving children a phone too early.

There are many reasons. Let’s look at a few of the main ones.

Mobile phones open children up to social media. Social media, if not handled correctly, can harm a child’s mental health.

As children begin to move from childhood to adulthood, they will be looking to work out who they are and their place in the world. The perfection that is idolised on social media may make them feel inadequate.

The unmitigated influence of influencers can be a concern. Through platforms like TikTok, internet celebrities can influence your child for good or bad.

Not all influencers are bad, but not all are good. Children have not fully developed critical thinking skills. They are also entering an age where they seek acceptance from their peers over their parents. This can make them vulnerable to negative influences and unhealthy or dangerous trends.

Cyberbullying is another real danger.

Of course, real bullying is terrible. Cyberbullying is no better. Through mobile phones, bullies can get to children wherever they are, meaning that home ceases to be a haven from the nastiness.

Increased screen time can have a negative impact on physical health and mental health.

As children spend more time on their phones, they spend less time engaging in other activities, such as sports, games and hobbies. This not only impacts physical health, as they exercise less, but also mental health, as they spend less time being creative and exploring their passions.

More time looking at a screen can also have a negative impact on sleep and eating patterns.

Social connection and a sense of belonging is a fundamental need for all humans. Having a strong connection with family and friends helps keep a child socially , physically and emotionally well.

Although mobile phones can sometimes be used as a mode of connection, they can also cause disconnect. You see this when children go out for a meal with family and spend the time hiding behind a screen rather than talking. Mobile phones can create situations where people are together physically, yet each isolated in their own world.

Children and Mobile Phones: The Good

Despite the bad press, many children are still given mobile phones. Why? Is it just that parents are getting soft? Or worse still, are parents looking for ways to keep their children quiet and out of the way?

I don’t believe that is the case. There are many more positive reasons why children may be given a mobile phone.

Independence and freedom become vital as our children age and mature. A mobile phone can allow an older child to do more things, like walk to the shops, or walk home from school alone, whilst still being able to reach out to a grown up if they need to.

In days gone by, children did these things without a mobile phone. However, it is still safer, and sometimes just useful for them to have a way to stay in touch.

Local communities have changed a great deal in the last few decades. People rarely know most people in their area or even on their street. When children get invited to a friend’s house, there is a good chance you won’t know the parents. It can be tempting to want to keep our children safe and at home, but that is not good for their social well being or mental health.

Making sure that they have a way to call or text you if they feel unsafe, can make letting go easier

Communication and connection are as important for our children and young people as they are for us.

There is no denying that spending face-to-face time with others is better than connecting digitally, but with the pressures of modern life, it is hard for people to meet as often as they would like.

Allowing your child to connect through text, calls or messages to friends and family members can help them bond with the important people in their world.

If your child is using a phone for this purpose, it is important to teach them phone etiquette and ensure that controls are in place so they are only connecting with people you know and trust.

Education used to be grounded in paper and ink. That is no longer the case. There are a lot of ways that a mobile phone or tablet can aid learning.

If your child wants to practise spelling or maths, there are apps and online games that they can use. Online articles and videos are available covering a multitude of topics. Some children will enjoy reading online news and learning about what is happening in the world around them.

When our children reach adulthood, they will have a mobile phone. Letting your older child have one when they are still under your care allows you to teach them digital responsibility and moderation.

Using parent control apps and with clear phone rules, you can help your child to develop a healthy attitude to technology. In time you can support them in learning to use their phone in ways that make them happy and more connected, rather than it being something negative in their life.

Sims and control apps for children

If you are on the fence about getting a phone for your child, a child-friendly sim might be a good idea.

ParentShield are a fantastic option. The SIM records all calls and messages. This is a contentious feature, as some parents worry about invading privacy. It is important to let your child know that their communication is being recorded. The recordings can be referred to when you have cause for concern.

If you choose ParentShield, make sure that you opt for one of the plans that includes data so that you can keep an eye on location.

Another option is to use a regular SIM but download a parental control app, which helps you control your child’s phone usage.

A final note

The choice to get a mobile phone for your child is not always a bad one. If you do decide to take the leap, make sure that you are aware of the risks and create healthy boundaries around its use.

Ensure that you have a healthy structure of discipline in place so you can calmly enforce the boundaries that you believe are healthy and safe.

I wish you all the peace

Hannah Louise

References

Cook, Amanda Barnes. “Connection and Disconnection: Parenting with Smartphones.” Respectful Parent, 14 Aug. 2014, respectfulparent.com/connection-and-disconnection-parenting-smartphones/. Accessed 2 Apr. 2025.

Herbert, Edward. “Should Children Have Mobile Phones? | the Children’s Society.” Childrenssociety.org.uk, 18 Dec. 2024, www.childrenssociety.org.uk/what-we-do/blogs/should-children-have-mobile-phones.

Lyness PHD, D’Arcy. “How Can Social Connection Help Kids & Teens Feel Less Lonely? (for Parents).” Kidshealth.org, Oct. 2023, kidshealth.org/en/parents/social-connection.html.

Miller, Caroline . “When Should You Get Your Kid a Phone?” Child Mind Institute, Child Mind Institute, 25 Feb. 2016, childmind.org/article/when-should-you-get-your-kid-a-phone/.

Purebred Marketing. “8 Reasons Why You Should Give Your Kid a Phone.” COSMO Technologies, Inc., 23 Feb. 2024, cosmotogether.com/blogs/news/8-reasons-why-you-should-give-your-kid-a-phone?srsltid=AfmBOoqEmhlK6azzbH-WWVuEDv2Z8zT_iGiPbrtLouNopIWhX9gPrbEr. Accessed 3 Apr. 2025.

“The Importance of Play and Social Connections in Early Child Development – London School of Childcare Studies.” London School of Childcare Studies, 8 Oct. 2024, childcarestudies.co.uk/blog/the-importance-of-play-and-social-connections-in-early-child-development/.